Wednesday, May 13, 2009

The Un-curious Case of Mr. Pringles

It’s almost the end of a work day and I’m completely dehydrated from finding comfort in way too many carbs and all stuffed up from allergies. I feel gross. Like the tap water I’m drinking from a disgusting, scratched up plastic tumbler. Used. Tacky. Dirty.

Speaking of which, I cannot for the life of me understand why some guys, inspite of all those commercials and government-sponsored ads, think they’re Mr. Invincible when it comes to unprotected sex. Now, my issue isn’t the whole unprotected sex bit (’cuz if they don’t already get that, then yes, they totally deserve a visit from a Valtrex Vixen), but the fact that there’s specifically this one guy I know of who, like Mr. Pringles all horny-pervert-moustache and all, once he pops, “just can’t stop”.

And the unfortunate part is for all the sucker TrashyDumbSkanks out there who actually fall for this pathetic loser, perceived charms and all. There should be a place for all those bird-brained gold-diggers to congregate and get the stupid shit slapped out of them.

Newsflash: YES, he will f*&^ you. YES, he will f*&^ you again. And maybe a few more times, and after that, I promise you, YES he will forget you. AND if you’re one of the luckier TrashyDumbSkanks out there, he WILL make you look bad.

Not that you don’t already… afterall, it costs alot to look that cheap, hunny.

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